The most in-depth characters in an infomercial ever seen.

How many of us actually pay attention to late night infomercials? I always figured the only way any of the info on these ads enter brains is when we've fallen asleep and accidentally left the tv on. I shudder to think of how many times I subconsciously memorized this one.


Photo from infomercial-hell.com

Not only is this commerical filmed in rubbish lighting like most soap operas where you never see the outdoors, the characters bring a whole other world into existence. A world of young love, lust, elderly pigheadedness, gluttony, eating disorders, bad toupees, fake breasts, human evaporation and so much more.


The Bullet Express infomercial

Notice in the first few frames-the two children rush in, and are never seen again. Surely children would want to be around for mountains of food that magically sloshes out of a machine?

The couple are the last to make an entrance in to the kitchen, holding hands and looking extremely smug with sh*t-eating grins on their faces. Through out the entire ad the young man's eyes widen with amazement with what the Bullet Express can do, and then he looks to his lover, the blonde for approval. Then comes the attached-at-the-hip couple smile- with the wincing eyes that make them look like they're slightly in pain.

At 0:25 see mother of the invisible children's face turn into a freakish grimace as she listens to old lady no.1 rant about how there isn't any food set out to eat already. Around the time of the meatloaf that looks just like spam, old lady no.2 appears to be literally looking at the machine out of her nostrils.

When the nachos appear, so does the fat guy 'Ralphi' again. This company is setting a horrible stereotype that all overweight peoples lives revolve around food, and they are a bit thick in the head. Him grabbing the plate of nachos, putting one in his mouth and reaching for another before he has even chewed the first, let alone closed his lips around it, also signifies this man could have an eating disorder. He toddles off with the plate of nachos and sits in the armchair by himself. Later on the hosts play a joke on Ralphi, calling him to fetch a knife and cut up some veggies, knowing full well the Bullet Express will be done before he catches his breath.

I have to say, after all of my bashing, this has to be my favorite infomercial of all time. I've never gotten such a strong idea of what the characters personal lives are like in any other ad. Thank you Bullet Express.